Blog Archives

Thank Goodness She Doesn’t Have Mrs. Fluck for First Grade

Shelly’s daughter loves her first grade teacher, so she drew a picture and shared it with her.

Her teacher shared the picture with Shelly.

Shelly shared it with Stuff Kids Write.

Thanks, Shelly.

Thanks, Shelly’s daughter.

Thanks, Shelly’s daughter’s teacher, Mrs. Schmidt.

Sharing truly is the sh*t.

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If you’d also like to be the sh*t, share with us! Email your image to mcfadden.chase@gmail.com or leanneshirtliffe@gmail.com. Pieces can be posted with credit or anonymously, and if you have a personal blog/site you’d like us to link to, we will!

(PS – If you happen to be reading this and your name actually is Mrs. Fluck and you’re a first grade teacher, PLEASE! PLEASE! PLEASE! send us just a handful of  what must be the thousands of student papers you’ve collected over the years with your name misspelled. Thanks!)

A Dog: Every Kid in the Universe (Including Aliens) Should Have One

Read this manifesto letter and decide for yourself, but we’re pretty sure that 9-year-old Rylan — of Lego portfolio fame — would like to have a dog.

Your sorrowful son? Talk about twisting the canine dagger.

Thanks to Travis and Suzie — Rylan’s heartless parents — for sharing this masterpiece of wanton kid-inflicted parental shame inducement with SKW.

Stuipid Gardening

You gotta love an 8-year-old who reads history.

You gotta love an 8-year-old who brings history to his backyard.

In the words of his dad, Lloyd Rang:

Cameron read that the ancient Romans would insult basil to make it grow better. So, out of love and concern, he put up this (somewhat ironic) sign:

Now excuse me, I’m off to swear at my #$%&ing peonies.

~

Cameron’s writing has appeared here twice before. I can’t help but adore this kid even though I’ve never met him. Please check out a touching post, How Our Kids Re-Write Us, and a hilarious one, When Kids Try Hot Sauce.

Follow Lloyd’s intelligent and hilarious musings on Twitter: @LloydRang.

Things Really Went Downhill in 2nd Grade

And my 8-year-old’s other moms?

Total trolls. Really.

Thou Shalt Not Steal (or I’ll Tell Mom!)

Sometimes, you just have to take a stand against the tyranny of a sister.

And if that doesn’t work, write a note to your mom telling on her.

Thanks to Megan for sharing this detailed incident report from her son.

No Wonder My Dreams Weren’t Coming True: I’d Been Using Shredded Cucumber!

Amanda Bast, who’s sent in great stuff before, submitted this piece. She explains:

A little girl handed me this gem after teaching her grade 4 class. She offered no explanation, just handed it over and refused to explain it.

It reads:

Secret Recipe for your wish to come true

-cat hair

-dog hair          (10 wishes for 10 drops)

-yogurt

-ripped up paper

-cucumber (sliced)

-MIX

-Stir

-Pour over head

-think hard

-Done

Seems easy enough. And it’s easy to smile when you read Amanda’s stuff, too. Go check out her site by clicking here. Thanks, Amanda!

Having Fun With Family Axing Turkeys

December has arrived, but here’s a quick recap of November compliments of my 7-year-old son Nolan (and his backpack):

Not sure whether that’s supposed to read “Enjoying family” or “Ignoring family.”

And for the record, our family will go ax a Christmas tree in coming weeks, but we’ve yet to bond while decapitating poultry.

That would be fowl.

Holy Gwockomoly! This Birthday Card is Be. A. Utiful.

A card — particularly the homemade variety — can be a gift in and of itself.

Like this one.

MW, my 7-year-old nephew, composed this handcrafted masterpiece for his mom on her birthday. It’s beyond words.

But here are a few anyway:

1. Sydney is the dog. No mention of MW’s younger brother, but he undoubtedly loves his mama, too.

2. Mother and son both have beautiful eyes. True story. Probably genetic.

3. Correctly spelling “beautiful” — twice — is impressive at any age.

4. My sister-in-law really does make the best gwockomoly.

5. Nothing says “happy birthday” like hearts. And bananas.

*****

Thanks to MW’s dad for sharing this beauty, and now it’s your turn.

It’s letters-to-Santa season! We’ve already received several, and we’d love to share your submission with the readers of Stuff Kids Write, as well.

Remember, ’tis the season of giving, and a laugh is an easy gift to give. Plus it requires no wrapping. So send your submission to stuffkidswrite@gmail.com today!

From Liquor to Body Parts: Kids and Their Vices

On the first few days of school, most teachers gather some background information, trying to get to know the students who will be occupying their classroom for the next ten months.

So like all his second grade classmates, J completed a worksheet about his favorite activities, hobbies, and sports. His mom Susanna came across her son’s handiwork at his Back-To-School night.

This is what she saw.

As a teacher herself, Susanna was particularly horrified by her son’s favorite hobby: partying. More subtle was his favorite place to go, Ronny’s Market, their neighborhood liquor store. And she’s pretty sure J’s favorite thing to collect is “pennies,” not penis as it looks. But at she says, who knows?

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To read about more of J’s antics, please go and visit Susanna Morgan’s blog, Not June.

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How would your child/niece/neighbor’s kid (or you) answer these questions?

Please remember to submit your child’s writing to us at stuffkidswrite (at) gmail (dot) com.

Be Honest: Farting Noises Is One of Your Top 20 Favorite Games to Play, Too

Kids love making lists, whether they’re letters to Santa or detailed explanations of their favorite things.

And kids are honest.

This is a terrific combination.

Cathy shared this list that her 7-year-old created for a school project. She explains:

You can imagine how proud I was to see Xander’s “Me Collage” displayed in the hall outside his 2nd grade classroom, where he listed all of his favorite things to play, and last but not least, at #19 is every 7-year-old boy’s favorite past-time… farting noises.

So Xander made a list, but he may not have checked it twice.

Farting noises has to be ahead of soccer guys, right?

*****

Thanks to Cathy for sharing Xander’s memorable “Me Collage” with Stuff Kids Write.

HELPFUL REMINDER: Parent-teacher conferences are a great time to wander the halls and classrooms, whip out your camera phones, and snap pics of funny kid writing that you come across. Then send it to StuffKidsWrite@gmail.com. And please tell your children’s teachers about us, as well!

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