Category Archives: Writing in Weird Places
P.S. – I Definitely Know I Don’t Like Mom’s Meatloaf
Sometimes kids write in strange places.
Thanks to SKW reader Tina for submitting this awesome piece. She explains:
I found this note while moving. I’ve had that table for about 8 years and never knew it was there!
The unanswered question: Who wrote this?
Based on the sentiment expressed, we can at least narrow it down to only those kids who’ve ever had parents.
Stuipid Gardening
You gotta love an 8-year-old who reads history.
You gotta love an 8-year-old who brings history to his backyard.
In the words of his dad, Lloyd Rang:
Cameron read that the ancient Romans would insult basil to make it grow better. So, out of love and concern, he put up this (somewhat ironic) sign:
Now excuse me, I’m off to swear at my #$%&ing peonies.
~
Cameron’s writing has appeared here twice before. I can’t help but adore this kid even though I’ve never met him. Please check out a touching post, How Our Kids Re-Write Us, and a hilarious one, When Kids Try Hot Sauce.
Follow Lloyd’s intelligent and hilarious musings on Twitter: @LloydRang.
No I Amn’t!
My 8-year-old took time from his busy morning routine of slurping cereal and moving as slowly as humanly possible to print this label for his 6-year-old nemesis brother last week as they ate breakfast.
Not surprising. Siblings fight. It’s natural. Kids even write poems about it.
What was surprising — at least to the two combatants — is how much their dad enjoyed it. So I thought I’d share.
Your welcme.
P.S. – Light a Match or Something!
Jake has a little sister. She’s 10. We think she’s got a terrific sense of humor. Jake may not agree.
Thanks to Vicki for this submission. Check out her blog Where the FuhKaui? Don’t worry: it doesn’t stink.
P.S. – Daddy, Help Yourself to the Three-Layer Dark Chocolate Stuff
Olivia shared this note from her 8-year-old daughter, Teagan.
It’s clear that Teagan understands how dads operate. Her mom explains:
Tonight I had to run by the grocery store to pick up a prescription. Two kids in tow, I sent them to go pick out some Jell-o or pudding (they didn’t even have to agree on a flavor). They thought I was the coolest mom ever; I was just happy to not have them in the pharmacy line with me.
My son, who’s 7, returned with the adult version of pudding: dark chocolate, three layers, and a something that was supposed to look like raspberries. My daughter, who’s 8, came back with lemon-lime Jell-o. Sugar free. In other words, about as tempting as the open-backed gown and hospital bed that usually accompany such a treat.
When we got home, each kid enjoyed a cup and then headed towards their bedtime routines. I went about picking up the tornado of the day, and upon opening the fridge I found this (at least she wrote it with love):
We can only assume that the three-layer, dark chocolate pudding – which did not have a sticky note disclaimer – was fair game.
Smart girl, Teagan.
*****
Thanks to Olivia for submitting to Stuff Kids Write (and please go check out her site Cross Training). She would probably agree that it took her less time to snap a pic of Teagan’s note and email it to stuffkidswrite@gmail.com than it would to eat one of those Jell-o snacks. And Stuff Kids Write has zero calories! (Open-backed gowns are optional.)
So what are you waiting for? Submit today!
Oedipus Wrecks
I’m pretty sure my son could be featured in every chapter of a Psychology 101 textbook.
Oedipus Complex? You bet. Check out how William engraved his name on the wall above his mommy’s side of the bed. Medium: Pencil on Paint.
Psychological Ownership? Yup. See how he carved his name into our desktop monitor. This is two years after the fact. It doesn’t come off. Medium: Etching on Liquid Crystal.
Mob Behavior? Yes. If you’ve read this blog for a while, you know that William (and his twin sister) used gravel to carve their names into the side of our minivan. Medium: Rock on Paint.
Juvenile Delinquency? Maybe. William wrote his name on my parents’ RV. Medium: Finger on Dust.
I wonder what happened to using tree trunks, the walls of public washrooms, and school desks to make your mark.
Where have you carved (or would like to carve) your name? Medium?
6-Year-Old Renaissance Child
Annie is a writer.
So is her 6-year-old son, who just finished kindergarten.
I’ll let her set up this note.
I have a notepad I carry with me to jot ideas on. It’s usually full of half-written blogs, grocery lists, and other to-do items. Dictator, my 6-year-old, got his hands on it and inspiration kicked into high gear. He is a writer in training.
Page One
Page 2
Given that Dictator can already fill two pages of his mom’s notebook and that he knows the difference between a 3-pointer and a 3-fro, I’m betting we have a Renaissance Man on our hands.
And the world needs more of those.
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Visit Annie at her fantastic blog, Six Ring Circus; you won’t be disappointed. You can also follower her on Twitter @Annie6rc.
The Meen Kind of Ha Ha
There are several common variations of “ha ha”:
- the happy “ha ha”
- the sad “ha ha”
- the flirty “ha ha”
- the courtesy “ha ha”
- the anxious “ha ha”
- the dirty “ha ha”
- the lethargic “ha ha”
- the Nelson “ha ha”
- the inebriated ha ha
- the relieved ha ha
- and, of course, the meen ha ha.
Angela submitted this beautifully hand-crafted note from her 5-year-old daughter F.M., who composed her inspired piece during a family road trip.
AFTER being told by her mother that she would have to put her shoes on to go in a restaurant.
It takes a high-quality, food-industry strength paper napkin to absorb that much spite.
And just to make sure there was no confusion regarding the tone of her “ha ha,” once the family was back in the vehicle F.M. wrote this note. And then immediately tore it up.
Hell hath no “ha ha” like a 5-year-old who has to put her shoes back on.
*****
Thanks for sharing, Angela! And please go check out Angela’s website at slabcinema.com.
Stuff Kids Write on Non-Traditional Surfaces
Soccer night. Two kids on two different teams playing at two different fields. I have enough equipment to load down a trio of Sherpas. My husband is at a meeting and, as usual, I’m barely coping in my attempt to get everything and everyone out the door. I send Vivian and William outside while I gather the last of the gear, which includes my mitts and sunglasses (nothing says soccer season in Canada like contrasting accessories).
The door slams behind me. I notice Vivian and William collecting rocks on the side of our driveway.
I load the last of the stuff and walk around to open William’s side of the van.
I see this writing:
"William" (with sad face above)
“Did you use a rock to write on the van?” I say. Sometimes you have to ask the obvious.
Vivian looks at me. I can tell she’s stalling. “I’ll just crawl in William’s side,” she says.
“You didn’t write—“ I interrupt myself. “Did you carve things too?”
I walk over to the other side.
I see this.
"Vivian only" (with scratches on the left, where she was trying to get the rock to work properly)
And this.
"on behalf of my class" (yes, she's composing dedications)
My kids know by my speechlessness that they’ve done wrong.
I rub my index finger across one of the gorges. “This won’t come off,” I say. “Ever.”
I hear choruses of “I’m sorry” and “We didn’t know.”
And I think: Freaking stuff kids write.
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AND THE WINNER IS…
Wendy M of Herding Cats in Hammond River is the random winner of last week’s giveaway, a Starbuck’s gift card. Thanks, Wendy, for sending us some hilarious stuff kids write. It will be featured in an upcoming post.
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Thanks to all who’ve sent us photos of funny writing by your kids (or from when you were young). We’ll let you know when we run it!
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If you have any stuff kids write, please consider submitting it to us. See the sidebar for more information.
